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Bloody Bookaholic's Commandment:

Thou Shall Read Till Thy Eyes Bleed

Sunday 24 November 2013

Review: The Hunger Pains by The Harvard Lampoon



Title: The Hunger Pains: A Parody
Author: The Harvard Lampoon
Series: No
Book #: 1
Pages: 157
Reading Level: YA
Book Rating: 
Goodreads Rating: 3.46
Published: Feb. 07 , 2012


Winning means wealth, fame, and a life of therapy.
Losing means death, but also fame!
This is The Hunger Pains.

When Kantkiss Neverclean replaces her sister as a contestant on the Hunger Games—the second-highest-rated reality TV show in Peaceland, behind Extreme Home Makeover—she has no idea what to expect. Having lived her entire life in the telemarketing district’s worst neighborhood, the Crack, Kantkiss feels unprepared to fight to the death while simultaneously winking and looking adorable for the cameras. But when her survival rests on choosing between the dreamy hunk from home, Carol Handsomestein, or the doughy klutz, Pita Malarkey, Kantkiss discovers that the toughest conflicts may not be found on the battlefield but in her own heart . . . which is unfortunately on a battlefield.

Taschima's POV:


I finally made it through that. It was hard to make myself read till the very end, but I managed it! I give myself props for that, and I will tell you why.


First off, this was supposed to be a parody am I not correct? Well, where is the funny? I can count the amount of times I CHUCKLED while reading this book with one of my hands. I have a sense of humour, I am not one of those readers who gets offended if someone makes a joke about a book I like, but if it's not a funny joke I'm not gonna laugh! This book was just written because The Hunger Games is all the hype now and they wanted to take a stab at it. They did it with Twilight (and that one was actually kind of funny) but this one? They couldn't get a funny angle on it! Some of the "funny" points of the book include:
  • Peeta (in the book Pita) is super fat, loves to eat, and can't move from point A to point B without needing assistance. First off, why would this be funny? With better writing I could see someone making a joke out of Peeta being SO IN LOVE with Katniss (her name in the parody is Kantkiss, ha ha... not). But no, they decided to play on the fat jokes, and trust me they don't make you laugh at all.
  • Gale (in the book his name is Carol... why again?) is super into himself and is always plaguing Kantkiss' thoughts. Again with better writing I could potentially get into this, but it really had no comic effect in the story. None what so ever.
  • Rue (Run in the book) is a baby. LITERALLY. She is a freaking baby (quite deadly at that; she manages to kill a couple of people). I just... no. What's even badder (if that is even a word) is that they use the farts jokes with her. Please just stop it, you are making it worse.
  • Kantkiss is just a narrator throughout the story with no original voice of her own. She is incredibly naivee and holds more of her share of stupid stocks. You are killing me book. 
At least if you are going to poke fun at a book (which I am totally for) do it in a funny way! With GOOD writing! This book seems like someone scrambled to put it together at the very last minute with a lot of bad outdated jokes (much like Cinna does in the book with Kantkiss's dresses- at one point she was a mummy made out of toilet paper, sounds funny in theory but in the book is torture). And god it took me so long to finish, I had to make myself sit down and finish it because I wanted to have the right to say to you guys that I finished this book in its entirety and it sucked. The most enjoyable part of The Hunger Pains in my opinion was when the hovercraft people collected the dead bodies and we got a glimpse of what they were talking about, which was their boring day to day lives. By the end of the book I even wanted Kantkiss to die to know how Dave was doing (the last convo he wanted to open his own fish restaurant but needed help in getting money for said opening, I hope everything works out for you Dave). 


And because I don't want to seen as being completely negative (even though this is the first book I have given a one star to in over 2 years) here is one of the parts that made me chuckle:
"Just as I'm realising how difficult it will be to dig a hole with my bare hands, a parachute drops down containing a metal shove. Great, another brainteaser from buttitch. What could it mean? 
... 
That's when I understand the meaning of the shovel, and with a quick smack on the back of the head, Pita is out like a light." 
I would have looked for the other one that made me chuckle, but I don't want to go through it again. Please don't make me.




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